NEW JOB!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HOLY COW!!!!! I have a new job for next year!!!! I am going to be working in Plano ISD in West Plano! It will be a resource position and I will have two grades on my caseload, one from the upper grades (3-5) and one from lower (K-2). I am REALLY excited!!! The principal and people there were extremely nice and when I had my interview it felt like I had already known them for years. I am extremely excited! Next fall is going to be insane learning all of the different programs but hey if I can get through this year I can do anything. :-) Another little side note is that I am getting back from the Mediterranean cruise on Sat. Aug. 7 and I thought I would have to start work on Monday but Plano doesn't start new teacher orientation until Wednesday!! More great news!! Maybe I can actually recover in that amount of time! :-)

Things are really looking up. I have a job next year that will be amazing (even on the rough days it will be pure bliss because I have this year to compare it to). I am on cloud 9 with Steven and climbing higher. I have amazing friends that are there for me through anything and everything. My family is healthy. Oh man, I am just full of joy right now, just plain joy.

:-)

The Weekend/ Eythan

Hello blog world! This weekend was WONDERFUL. Lauren came in town and we got to have time with just the two of us and we both think that hasn't really happened since we lived together. It was really nice to be able to talk with one another. I can't tell you how much you mean to me girl, thank you for always being such a wonderful friend. :-)

I have been on Operation Eythan since Sat. morning. Sophia and Rick went out of town for the terrazzo convention and asked if I could watch my nephew, and of course I did. It's actually been a lot of fun. Lauren and I took him to Chuckie Cheese on Saturday and it was a blast! We went there for his birthday a few weeks ago but it was still cute to see him just run from one game to the next to the next haha. Over all I've been really tired but it's been great to hang out with just him and me. We have done that for babysitting and what not but not for this long. It makes me excited for what is to come in ten years or so.

I am extremely happy right now and this is based upon a certain person. We met a little over a week ago. His name is Steven and he's Rachel's boyfriends best friend. I'm not going to go into all of the details right now but let's just say I have never felt this way before and we have EVERYTHING in common, and I'm not kidding on the everything, we keep saying that we are the same person because we agree on everything from politics to religion to every day comments. :-) I had a freak out moment on Thursday but everything is fine now, I just realized I would rather be scared with him than sad without him. You can't meet a person like him and just walk away, it's just not possible. :-) Ok.. I'm going to stop now or this blog is going to be waaaaayyy to long.

Pandora: I started playing Pandora in my classroom a few months ago to help have a calming atmosphere. (I play classical music.) I have now put on my own station for lunch time and after school and it's pretty awesome. I am finding some new songs that I'm going to add to my repertoire. Also, I did not know that Harry Connic Jr. sang. He has an amazing voice. I am rather impressed because I always think he is so goofy and his voice definitely is not.

That is all for today. Have a wonderful whatever time of day you are reading this! :-)

Best Birthday EVER

Hello internet world! I had the best birthday weekend ever. It really all started on Wednesday with celebrating Sophia's birthday (we have the same birthday) at her house. It was really nice to all get together for dinner and just sit and chat. Sophia and Rick got me pillows!! I know that's lame but I have been needing new pillows for a long time.

Thursday (my actual birthday) we went to eat sushi and my parent's surprised me for my birthday cake to go to the Rose Tattoo (VERY nice place- the chef is awesome) and have a slice of his amaretto cheesecake. TO DIE FOR! After that it was just a lazy night with my shows but it was nice to have the relaxation.

Friday I had an interview in Allen that went really well and I actually got a second interview for next week. That night I was able to hang out with the beautiful and intelligent Rachel Yedlowski. We had a really great night filled with our normal Olive Garden and movie. (side note: Date Night was really good! Based on the previews it didn't look very good but it was actually one of the best I've seen in a while. Full of action and heart felt moments. My kind of movie.) After that I was able to meet her boyfriend Charles and his room mate Steven. We had a great night laughing and getting to know each other.

Saturday was crazy! I had a screening interview in Lewisville (you had to be invited to it) which went really well. They asked the same questions as last year so I was prepared and felt a lot more comfortable. It's crazy looking back on a year ago when I did that. It was my first interview and I drove away balling because I had been so nervous and thinking I wouldn't find a job. It's amazing what 525, 600 minutes can do. After that I went on a pub crawl in Uptown for Crawl for Cancer. I actually went with people I have never met before! It's my sister's client's son and his friends. It was great to meet new people and I did not partake in the festivities because it was all beer and I was going out that night. I was rather proud of myself for having the guts to go out with people I have never met for five hours. Go me! Soooo that night! We went to The Quarter in Addison for my birthday because they have karaoke and holy cow it was awesome! I had almost all of my Dallas (of course missing people in different towns) friends there and my older sisters and brothers and it was just amazing for everyone to finally be able to meet each other and sing at the top of our lungs (I finally got my voice back Monday). The only thing I'm sad about it that I didn't get pictures of everyone (I know, me!). I was just having to much fun. :-)

I want to thank everyone that wished me a happy birthday and was part of me turning 24. I love all of you and could not make it through life without you by my side. Thank you!

Reflection on the year of 23

Well, with it being my birthday and all I feel I should write a post reflecting on the past years events. Although a lot has not gone well or according to plan I will try to put a positive spin on things. A few weeks (2 or 3) after my birthday is when we found out my mom's cancer was back. A week after that I graduated from college. Two months after that I started my first real job. A lot of transition and life events happening. I look back on those months and they are really just a blur. I think I was just trying to make it day to day. Get by in the best way I could.

I have paused and I'm really trying to think of a way to not have this be a completely depressing post, and I don't really know how to spin it. The only thing I can think of is that I am a lot stronger than I thought I was. I knew I was strong, very strong, because of everything else I have gone through in my life. But I really didn't think I would make it this year. There were several times I thought about just quiting my job and giving up on teaching. But I didn't, I stuck through it. I stuck through the concussion, the two months of restraining from 8-3, being put on administrative leave for things I didn't do, and working with the person who tried to get me fired. I did it. I made it. I even think I did it pretty well. There were awful days. A lot of days I would just come home crying and go to sleep because I just didn't want to think about having to do it all again the next day. But now looking back I can't believe I made it. I really made it. And I still want to teach, I still love kids, and I still want to make a difference, and I know that I can.

God. This has been a difficult subject for me the past year. And I think I am finally ready to talk about Him. He has royally pissed me off this year. I feel like I have always been a good servant, have tried to be the example of Christ He wants me to be. I always ask Him what he wants of me and I try to follow through with what I think He wants. Here is the problem. I prayed a lot about which job I should take this year. And I really felt at peace with that He wanted me to work at the school I am at. So this brings up two things. Either this is where He wanted me to be and for some reason wanted me to go through the hell I have gone through this year. Or that is not what He was saying and I don't know how to listen to Him. I have never stopped believing He is there. And I am sure He has been watching me this whole time struggling and wanting to help. But I just don't get it. Because if He wanted me to go through this year my big question is WHY? I have been through enough events to say that I am strong, I can make it through anything. Was this another story that I can tell people to strengthen their relationship with God because it will (I am no where near having it strong right now but I'm sure eventually it will get there- just don't the path right now to get to that place) strengthen mine. Or was I just not listening correctly? Which makes me think was I really listening or just making up stuff? I know He is there, I can't see the beauty in the world and the stars in the sky and the love in people's hearts to see that something larger than science has made all of this. I'm just so angry with what has happened and why it has happened. And I don't know if I will ever get an answer. I just don't know why so many people have to suffer in this world. To be honest I would rather have pure bliss and no free will then to have all of the pain I have had. That has been weighing on me for a while so thank you blog space for letting me get it out there. There is no real answer or specific response that I want. Just kind of putting it out there and hoping for an answer at some point in my life.

Another topic from this year is friends. I could not have made it this year without them by my side. With every catastrophic event always brings the realization of how matters the most to you and who you matter the most to. I am very happy to say that this go around and I have realized that all of the friends I have are the ones I thought they were. :-)I really can't express how much it has meant to me, and I know I just said this but I REALLY could NOT have made it without you. And if you are reading this blog than you are definitely one of those people. :-) Love you guys.

The only conclusion I can come to from the year of being 23 is that I am a beast. ;-) I have amazing friends and family. And that next year can only get better. :-)

Holy Cow It's Been A While

Hey guys! So I am really going to try to get better at this whole blog thing now that I am starting to feel like myself again.

Life is on the up hill now and thank God because I don't know if I could have continued on that path for much longer. ANYWAYS! Updates on the parts that have been rough:

Job: ONLY 38 DAYS LEFT! The student that was causing most of the problems moved so life is A LOT easier! My anxiety has gone down a lot as well because I can make it through the day now, even try to enjoy it. :-)

Search for new job: I have three interviews this week and the one today went amazingly well! It's in west Plano and the principal said that she really liked me and once she gets the green light from HR (all the special ed transfers have to be done before they can hire out of district) she will call me. I really liked the principal and the other special ed team members. They are all pretty young so I feel like I would fit in a little bit better as well. I have Mesquite on Wed. and Allen on Fri.

Mom: She is doing really well, she has stopped the chemo that goes into her port (the liquid chemo) but is still taking the chemo pills. Just taking the pills for some reason has made her nauseous a lot but she is being a trooper.

Well, in case you didn't see on my facebook I am single now. I'm not going to talk about it on here because I don't think that would be very appropriate but I am doing really well and do not regret my decision. I think we are both a lot better off and will be happier with other people.

On that note, I really don't want to date anyone for a long time. I am just so tired of dating. I have been dating for about 10 years and I'm just exhausted. I'm just tired of making the same bad decisions in relationships, I knew they were there before and yet I made the same ones again and again. So point is, I will be focusing on my family, friends and job for the next however long it takes for me to feel confident again that I can make the right choices in a relationship.

A few weeks ago my dear friend Jet got married! Congrats buddy!



My spring break trip to Washington, D.C. was AWESOME! Here are a few pics:



The White House.. enough said.



A senior portrait at the Arlington Cemetery.



With my second favorite president!

Other than that I am working on getting healthy again.. I have been saying that for a while now but I really think I am going to set up an incentive program like Lauren to get myself into gear. The main thing is food. I like to much of it and the wrong stuff. haha

I think that's all for tonight. Hopefully the next post will be soon. :-)